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Oh gosh....it's funny how somewhat accurate this is... [Oct. 11th, 2005|10:11 pm]
How do they do it????

The Priss
Deliberate Brutal Love Dreamer (DBLDf)

Mature. Responsible. Aristocratic. Excuse me. The Priss.

Prisses are the smartest of all female types. You're highly perceptive, and confident in your judgements. You'd take brutal honesty over superficiality any time--your friends always know where they stand with you. You're completely unfake. Don't tell me that's not a word. You're also excellent at redirecting internal negative energy.

These facts indicate people are often intimidated by you. They also fall for you, hard. You have a distant, composed allure that many find irresistible. If only more of them lived up to your standards.

Your exact opposite:
The Playstation

Random Gentle Sex Master
You were probably the last among your friends to have sex. And the first to pretend that you're pregnant. LOL. Though you're inclined to use sex as weapon, at least it's not as one of mass destruction. You're choosier than most about your partners. A supportive relationship is what you're really after. Whether you know it or not, you need something steady & long-term. And soothing.


ALWAYS AVOID: The Playboy, The Loverboy

CONSIDER: The Manchild


Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.
My profile name: Queen1287
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It's that time again... [Oct. 11th, 2005|10:47 am]
http://www.channelcincinnati.com/blitz5/index.html

Vote for Monroe for the game of the week. Although it looks like we're not going to win.
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Soundtrack of my Life [Oct. 10th, 2005|09:10 pm]
Your Life: The Soundtrack
Opening credits:This is the story of girl-Fuel [I think.]
Waking up:Perfect Day.Hoku
Average day:With a Little Help From My Friends-The Beatles
First date:So Impossible.Dashboard Confessional
Falling in love:Rest of My Life-Blessed Union of Souls
Love scene:The Kiss-Tristan Prettyman
Fight scene:Girl Fight.Brooke Valentine
Breaking up:I don't know. I don't break up.
Getting back together:Therefore, I don't get back together.
Secret love:For you to Notice.Dashboard Confessional
Life's okay:Don't Worry 'Bout a Thing.SheDaisy
Mental breakdown:Welcome to My Life.Simple Plan
Driving:Down.Something Corporate
Learning a lesson:Breathe-Annas Nalick
Deep thought:When I'm Gone.Brian Vander Ark
Flashback:Photograph.Nickleback-I just like the song.
Partying:In da club? Though I do hate clubs, they're dirty.
Happy dance:Barbie Girl.Aqua
Regreting:Untitled.Simple Plan
Long night alone:Grey Street.Dave Matthews
Death scene:I have loved you.Jewsica Simpson
Closing credits:Anna Nicole Show.Theme Song
Take this survey | Find more surveys
You've been totally Bzoink*d
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Homecoming 2005.... [Oct. 8th, 2005|12:29 pm]
Well, what a splendid occassion. The boys won last night!!! It was stellar and I was so happy for them. It is hard to come back after your first loss, and and so I'm glad they were able to focus and get it done. Even with everything against them...I mean they had a few good players just barely coming off injuries and Tad got hurt in the beginning of the game so he couldn't QB. They handled it though. They were awesome.

Being on Homecoming court was really nice. You don't really think it's important or nothing....but then when you think about how nice it is of people to think of you when they could have been thinking of like 50 other people...it's nice. It makes you really continue to appreciate everyone in your life...even if they're just people you sometimes see in the hallway and say Hi to, or people you beging small talk with or people you compliment just one time. I really love the people at Monroe and so it is good to know that they would think of me.

The dance is tonight and I don't have a date. Cray finally decided to go, so that's good. I wouldn't have wanted to do the Court dance by myself. Today is going to be the most relaxed formal occassion day I've ever had. I'm not getting my hair done until 2:00...and then I'm getting carryout from Taco Bell and eating at lindsays in our PJs until like 10 til, then we're going straight to the dance, lol. It's going to be nice. Stress-free.

Senior homecoming. The last one. I'm such a big girl now.
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**tears** [Oct. 1st, 2005|09:43 pm]
I am so bummed about hc. I went shopping today and when I go shopping I HAVE to have sa second opinion. Today the only person available was Daddy. Which is kinda fine...because he's got the plastic. But also not cool...because he can't sand shopping for more than an hour, and he hasn't good taste. So I ended up leaving with the first dress HE found. It's not the best. I haven't anything to wear it with. I had a dress picked out. It's so beautiful. And it would be so easy for my date to match:

http://eluxury.com/browse/product_detail.jhtml?styleid=10803210&SectionID=5000

They don't have it in my size. And the latter part is irrelevant because I never got a date.

I don't get to play in the powderpuff game. Again. And I'm actually healthy this year.


Damn!

I'm still happy and I still love you.

*kisses*
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I need to update. [Sep. 30th, 2005|11:24 pm]
I just think that I should for once write about teh good things in life. I have been complaining alot lately, and that is wrong. I am a very lucky person and I've got a good life. I can't complain. But I still do. I don't know why.


I am so SO SOOOOO happy to be playing soccer again. Now, I get frustrated with myself sometimes...but I am never not happy. I cried and prayed and hoped for this opportunity so many times for soooo long. No one could possibly imagine how often the desire to play ate away at me. I was ALWAYS thinking about it. God was so good to me in granting me a wierd string of events taht have allowed me to play and I am so appreciative. Soccer makes me happy always. When I'm at school....I can daydream about practice to pass the time. When I'm at practice, I can learn so much from my team and coaches and it's always a pleasure to be with those girls. They are so funny, smart, talented, and motivating. I am really glad taht they never show their frustration with me. They are always cheering me on, even when I consistantly mess up...they are just pushing me to do better. I know most teams wouldn't be like that.

No matter how many minutes I don't play, nor how many goals I don't score...every second of soccer is a blessing that I will forever remember and forever be grateful for. I just wanted to make that clear. Mainly because when I suffer from withdrawals, as I am now....I can become very emotional and say things I don't mean. But this entry is the truth.

I love you all, and thank you for making my life so wonderful.

*kisses*
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(no subject) [Sep. 27th, 2005|10:05 pm]
I want a goal.
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YaY!!! [Sep. 26th, 2005|12:18 am]
MML Sports finally updated the standings for Lady Soccer. The results are as follows:

In the North:
Carrol --- 21
Springboro - 18
Lebanon --- 15
Miamisburg - 15
Fairborn --- 3
Greenville - 3


...And the South:
Monroe --- 18
Fenwick --- 16
Stebbins -- 9
Talawanda - 7
Edgewood - 6
West Carrolton 3
Franklin -- 0




So we're winning the South and we're in the top three overall. But actually it's kind of scewed....because Fenwick is one conference game short of us. I don't see how...since we still have a conference game to make up. I suppose they have two. Anyhow....so this is a super close season. Our team goal was to win the MML this year, since last year we only won the south. I totally believe in my team, as long as they play with heart...they can do anything. We have a couple big league games this week and they're both at home...Tuesday and Thursday at 7:30. You should come cheer them on.

*kisses*
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I've been trying to avoid livejournal.... [Sep. 19th, 2005|08:32 pm]
But this entry isn't about soccer, so I figured it's okay:


I just need to vent about how much my family SUCKS. I've always been a family person, even though we're not your typical Brady bunch. But I'm so sick of it now. I won't do it anymore. I CAN'T it's rediculously pointless. There are so many instances that have generated the desire to change my attitude, but what happened tonight was the final straw.

Basically....I'm unimportant to this family. Everyone else's want's and desires come even before MY needs. I just can't deal with it anymore either. Like, right now since two of the cars have been totalled and my father and I are still paying for our medical bills, We have to share three cars between the 5 of us. I get last dibs on a car, no matter what the situation is. If I need a car to get to school....and Victor needs a car to go play tennis with his friend...Victor gets the car. And that isn't an over exaggeration either. These are honestly things my family does to me. Like, once I was at school....and Victor wanted to go out. So WITHOUT asking/telling me...my mother dropped him off at the school. He took my car. And I didn't find out until I realized I was stranded at the school with no way home. And then my good connections tell me he didn't even have the car with him because he was letting someone else drive it around they suppose?

That's fucked up.

Tonight...I wanted a car to go see my friend IN THE HOSPITAL. No one would come get me from practice to take me there. I wanted to visit him for like...5 or 10 minutes, just so he didn't have to be alone. Just so he knew people cared. And Mr. Sleepy-voiced Ian who apparently 'wasn't' sleeping, wouldn't let me borrow the car because he was "leaving right now". That was at 7:33. It's 8:43 right now and he's down stairs on his little game thingy. I told him I'd fill up his tank. I told him I just wanted to go to the hospital for 5 minutes to see my friend.


That's sweet.

That's sweet to be so pathetically selfish that he would LIE to me just because the favor I wanted to badly didn't benefit him enough. It left him with a happy sister and a full tank of gas....but apparently that's not enough.


Can anyone explain why they do this? I've tried to just accept it and live with it because they are my FAMILY and I want to love them and be good to them regardless. But it's just been biting me in the ass and wearing me down to deal with this everyday. Any favors. It's always give and not recieve. I know I shouldn't count but I am so tired of it. Wnen people need $100 or even more, I'm the first person to give it to them. But when I ask for two dollars no one will spare me. It's just little stuff like that. It just eats away at your self-worth. I mean I just want to understand why I am treated differently. I know everyone is mad at me because I've made our family poor but I'm SO TIRED of listening to that. If you think about it....what could I have done? If I was born with the fucking thing.... WHAT COULD I HAVE DONE? Aborted myself? If Ic ould make it any cheaper, I would. If I could pay for it, I would. Hell, If I could fucking GET RID OF IT, I would. But I can't. And I am sick of being blamed for that.


I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know how I'm going to change. But I do know that I'm beigining to be a VERY miserable person and I choose not to be anymore. I just know that I won't be speaking to my family anymore. Other than my father, since he's the only other one who's sick and the only one who makes me feel like it's okay.
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(no subject) [Sep. 8th, 2005|11:27 pm]
Maybe I'm almost finally ready to admit that soccer really was a stupid idea.
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(no subject) [Sep. 6th, 2005|11:12 pm]
One day all the pain will end.
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I know no one wants to read a hundred million useless random facts about me [Aug. 31st, 2005|02:44 pm]
...But I thought anything other than soccer would seem like a relief.

stolen from Melissa Dawn Steele )
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Tonight was my first Home Game. [Aug. 25th, 2005|10:11 pm]
And there's nothing really I can say about it.




Except I'll say this...it wasn't what I imagined. What I imagined SO many times.


eh well. Guess reality is just more realistic.
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After Two Long Years.... [Aug. 23rd, 2005|11:38 am]
It's here. Today is my first game.


I'm really really nervous. So I'm glad it's away. Because the game I'm REALLY excited about is our first home game. Thursday. So I'm hoping I can get all my nervous energy out tonight and be better by Then.



This is just good. This is just a really good thing that's happening. And I am really lucky.

*kisses*
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What a good couple of days. [Aug. 19th, 2005|10:16 pm]
Last night we had a scrimmage. It was nice. Monroe won. It was a good game for me. It was the first time I ever felt like I might be getting better. It wasn't anything big. I mean I still screwed up royally many, many times. I did all things wrong. I mean I might just be imagining things. Maybe I'm not better. But for some reason, last night I felt a slight change. I wasn't completely disappointed in every moment of the game. The skill still isn't there(...yet?), but it was like I was learning how to think like a soccer player again, which makes a big difference. I mean, at least it means I'm on the right track. I knew where to put the ball...even if my foot wasn't capable of putting it there. And I knew where I needed to be...even though I was too slow to get there. I was almost ALWAYS there to take the shot...to miss the shot, but I took them. Last scrimmage, I didn't. So if there are changes, they are subtle. Still, it's better than getting worse. It's better than no change at all. It gives me a little bit of faith again; reassures me that this IS an actual possibility and I'm not rediculous to risk my life for something I want.

Soccer makes me really happy. My teamates make me really happy. The meet-the-team made me really happy.

Tomorrow we have nothing. So I can't decide what I should do. I either need to prasctice...take this opportunity to make myself better. Or I need to rest my right leg and left foot. Mr. Day said the muscle in my right thigh is strained, so it's best to ice it and rest it. I don't know what the hell happened to my foot. But it doesn't feel like running and shooting with it is helping.


Maybe I should rest until noon, and then practice.


Half-n-half.



Ahh... I'm sorry. You don't care. But I have to just talk about it. Because it's important to me.


I love you all

*kisses*
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MONROE FOOTBALL [Aug. 18th, 2005|10:04 pm]
If anyone wants to go to Monroe's first game this season, Bob Kelly is getting a charter bus to take people.

Sounds like a sweet idea to me, you get out of driving two hours, and you get to see a great game.

The boys look wonderful this season. Let me know if you want to go. It's next Friday.
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We have a really good community. [Aug. 15th, 2005|04:31 pm]
I love Monroe.

It is good to live in a town where people care about each other and root for each other during the difficult times. We're lucky that we have people to understand us when we aren't doing so well. I hope all Monroeans realize how blessed we are.


I love you.

*kisses*
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I've got the song "Hear You Me" stuck in my head. [Aug. 14th, 2005|04:56 pm]
[music |"Hear You Me"....in my head.]

I don't know why.


I haven't recently heard it.



But I can't stop singing it.
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I don't know why I care about soccer so much. [Aug. 14th, 2005|12:53 pm]
It's not just soccer. I mean, it does make me very happy and I do have a great passion for it. It's just there are some other things too. It kind of represents alot. I was told I'd never play soccer again. And now I am.I grieved and grieved many nights for a long time over and people told me to let it go but I didn't, and it paid off. I imagined the day I'd play again so many times, and now it's here. This all symbolizes the idea thta I'm okay...that everything's going to be alright; that good things can happen and I can be happy. It's just a really good ordeal.


I made JV and Varsity. Or, as Jen so wonderfully puts it: "swinger". That means I wasn't good enough for Varisty, but she felt bad for me so she'll let me dress. Which is super sweet of her. I was really upset the first two days after I found out. I mean if I would have thought about it before hand, like..."hmmm, I wonder what I'll make...", I would have probably concluded either JV or swinger. But, I didn't think about it. Well, first off, I didn't think Seniors were allowed to play JV. I thought there was a rule? And secondly, I thought all of twoadays were tryouts. So I thought I still had a whole extra week to give my all and improve. So Jen just caught me off guard.

I mean it's humiliating to be a Senior playing JV. To be on the outside looking in on that....I can see if people would make fun. But I think it's good for me. I'm so far behind...I have alot to learn and I can learn from the JV girls. I just want to play soccer. And I honestly don't deserve to be on varsity. Not yet anyways. I am going to keep practicing everyday and hopefully eventually something will click. I would like to score one varsity goal this year.


My brothers are going to miss my first game.


That makes me sad. That makes me cry. But I probably won't actually have playing time. And if I did, it WOULDN'T be very impressive.

I love you.

*kisses*
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Oh I forgot to mention... [Aug. 13th, 2005|03:20 pm]
Successful weenie roast last night.


Except for the fact that I was late and tired and not very people-persony.


And except for the fact that Matthew didn't roast my teenie weenies.


He did make me one bun-sized weenie, however and it was very good. And I roasted a few myself.

And Mr. Hesson just couldn't keep his hands of of the other boys' weenies.


I probably shouldn't post taht on the internet.



But yeah...good WR #4!
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